full

for some reason, i had on my calendar that the full moon would be on saturday, june 30.

significant to me because it would be the only full moon in capricorn this year.

but the moon glow did not reach me that evening.

after what i had thought was a great day with the bf, save that we whiled most of it away napping and watching crappy what about brian reruns, it all culminated into a heated discussion about our current state of affairs.

heavy sighs. stifled swallows. thumping hearts.

i was sad to hear it all. i was glad to hear it all.

the bf rarely has issues with me, but when he does it is usually valid. this time i am not so sure if the stresses he has felt were entirely inflicted by me. regardless, we tried to talk it through.

definitely not my strong point. my pride rarely allows for such occurrences of talking candidly about feelings. with the bf. but i resolved not to close up and check out.

it is difficult when the one person you love most in this world feels like he falls short. it is harder still when he thinks you are the one who put him there. you want to reach down and breathe the spirit back in, to hold him and remind him that he means everything to you, that he is everything to you.

i tried. i hope he believes it. i'll keep trying.