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and so goes another month.

last week when i was back in minnesota, i went to a delightful little bar.

we made friends with the host.

his last name rang familiar. we asked about it. we asked about a man with the same last name. he said it was his brother.

a flood of memories. a redhead who used to tell me stories. wonderful little stories spun around a princess. the princess was always named sophie. and i loved every minute of every story. i used to beg for them daily, hoping to find one in my inbox, waiting for me like a little present.

he sent me notes like this:

don't tease him with your beauty. be generous.
I'm going to see my dad in the hospital right now. his heart is skipping beats.
kinda like me with you.

and i treasured every single one. until the stories turned into something else. and the stories that once made me so giggly and giddy turned just ever-so-slightly un-lovely. it happened so fast and one night when we were out and about and drinking guinness in irish pubs and racing down grand avenue in search of a ladies room, it got worse. spiraled. shattered. and it wasn't quite ever the same.

i should have known it wouldn't last.

i just didn't want to see it.

a little part of me still doesn't.

thxful

today i am thankful for many things.

mostly, i am thankful for the spa sampler package at hotel valley ho.



i am also giving thanks for my family. my friends. the sun. palm trees in november. my job. flight benefits. holiday cards. facebook. phone calls. cuddling. kleenex. my mom's text messages. white. holidays. hendrick's gin. cucumber water. strawberries. crabtree and evelyn's source hand treatment. ice cream. the bf. pink. peonies. newborns. my big, black ruffle skirt. j.crew tees. black. giggles. bubbly. pinot noir. bread. cheese. holding hands. tummy rubs. dermalogica moisturizer. dailycandy. love.

today

one more picture post:



that's all.

thx

it's all about balance.

somedays i have it. most days not.

but today, was lovely.

there is something about the short thanksgiving week that makes people work a little slower. a little less crazy.

i like it.

after work i made goop's tortilla espanola. mmm. potatoes onions eggs.

sigh. i love the days when i'm not so fried after work that i can actually cook.

it's blissful. and i'm thankful.

marcelo

the bf's birthday is coming up.

we are both going to minnesota this weekend.

he is going up north for a hunting trip.

i am staying in the city and hanging out with the girls.

so we both get what we want for his birthday. grin.

i ended up getting him:
*

i already broke and gave them to him since we won't see each other.

i know he likes the shades because he kept putting them on and modeling in front of the mirror.

huh. i thought only girls did that.

*it looks like a purse, but it's a weekend duffel.

j.crack

i have been ordering xmas presents like crazy lately.

stop laughing. i'm almost halfway complete.

i ordered the bf's mother a necklace and bracelet set from j.crew. rose gold and black crystals.

on monday, my j.crew package arrived.

i couldn't help but buy two t-shirts for myself. i am in love with j.crew tees. they are so formal and so casual at the same time. i've been pairing them with black skirts and pinstriped pants and loads of jewelry for work. so in love.




the necklace for the bf's mom was beautiful too. but no bracelet!

i called j.crew customer service the next day. too bad. the bracelet sold out. a store search came up empty. refund.

today, a new package arrived.

voila! the bracelet.

i called customer service and told them i received the bracelet in a different package and to make sure they charged my account. they did. and they gave me a $10 gift card for my honesty. how darling.

more j.crack tees for me!

roar

a nice evening out with good company.

martini.

dr. pepper baby-back short ribs.

green chile mac n cheese.

and lots of laughing.

i don't think i need to say more.

check

i have been so busy lately.

i started a new job, and it just. takes. a lot. out. of me.

i am trying to find the balance.

and i think soon i will have it.

i will be back in your arms once again.

and everything you do won't be so irksome. instead it will be quirky and adorable. i will not snap. i will love with my arms and my heart and my words. i will not grimace or grit. i will smirk and giggle. i will make time to listen. fully. not half-listening while plonking on my laptop late at night. i will notice the colors of the sunset and how full the moon is. clap my hands when something makes me happy. close my eyes without seeing work details. yoga in the morning. and cuddle at night.

someday. i will be yours.