boo

"Love beyond the ego has to be on a new basis. It's not about quid pro quo, giving as long as you get to take. It's mutual. It exists in a space between two people. The only way to be deeply happy in a relationship is to find that space every time you lose it. In this way, love goes beyond affection and being nice. Loving acts blossom naturally once you find the place in your own awareness that is love. Needless to say, becoming aware is a process, in love as in everything." - deepak chopra

yesterday i was so tired of love.

i couldn't remember what it felt like to not be. so. tired. the bf and i are amazing. we are amazingly in love. and yet. i feel so tired because the one thing we fight about, the one thing that covers an entire spectrum of emotions, is the one thing that i have always wanted. and that he hasn't been able to give me.

he wants me to be happy. that's all. he's ever. wanted. i get it. i have heard it. over and over. but the one thing that i think will make me the happiest is the one thing that he is unable to make happen.

and so i wait. and sometimes i get tired. of love. but never of the two of us.