ice

every thursday, the bf plays hockey.

and on most thursdays, i go with him.

please try to picture me, as much as you have gathered from 198 posts, going to a hockey game. not only that, but i am usually alone in the stands.

with no one to pay attention to me.

i am the lone chump in the crowd. the bf told me a comment about my sitting up there alone, week after week: "she must be a girlfriend, only girlfriends come to watch." when the bf went for drinks with the boys after one game, they said, "last time she looked sooo bored!"

why am i the only sucker?

like, hockey is played in an ice rink! an arena of cold and freezing bleachers. i find solace in the warm bathroom, except i feel too weird about spending too much time in there because i might get the "what is she doing in there?!" pressing the button for hot water over and over again, that's what!

i always bring a blanket, but it doesn't help. i am by myself. shaking. for an hour and a half.

but for minutes, i admire the bf and his skating.

that one is like a figure skater gliding across the ice, obvious in his little yellow helmet with his little chicken legs.

faster and faster, speedy little devil racing across the ice.

i am struck by his grace and his balance. and he surprises me again by being so many things in one person. i cheer his goals. i moan his misses. i squeal when he assists. i yelp when he collides. that is my boyfriend out there.

and that is the only reason i freeze my ass off every week.