oh, snap!

"don't get no man ready for nobody else" -bb

so true, so true.

my top ten relationship dealbreakers, including, but not limited to:
1. he is 35+ years old. if he doesn't want to get married and you do, why are you with him? and if he hasn't found the "right" girl by then? forget about it. there is a reason girls, there is a reason.*
2. he calls his mom more than once a day. or he cannot make a decision without consulting her. mama's boys are never, ever good.**
3. he is rude to waiters, doormen, bouncers, cleaners, cabbies, or your mom. strike that. if he is rude, period.***
4. he still hangs out with his exes (a la for birthdays, etc.) - there is no reason for that. when you're done with a relationship, be done. let it go.
5. he thinks potty humor is funny. really?!
6. if you can't see yourself married to him after one year, you will never see yourself married to him.****
7. is something missing? it will always be missing. stop looking for it, stop hoping for it, you will never find it with him.*****
8. if you fight about the same thing over and over.
9. you bring out the worst in each other.
10. he chooses _______ [insert activity of choice here] over you.******

ugh. boys are dumb, aren't they?

*don't try to sway me on this one. i stand by it.
**i might amend this to once a day being too much.
***also, if he has no manners. boot him.
****especially if you are over the age of 28.
*****never settle. what you expect is the least of what you deserve.
******my personal favorite: choosing home depot over me.